Reasons to Remove Family from Your Social Media

By Tequila Cheatham

“Andre Gray, who was credited for the invention of social media when he created the first Electronic Press Kit, (EPK) started a revolution in technology.” Without his release of the first EPK in 1995, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and others would not exist. Initially, the EPK was created for the sole purpose of making music become digital. Nowadays, people use social media for a variety of reasons such as to stay in contact with people from high school or college college, for business purposes, to make new friends with those from different walks of life, and to remain in contact with extended family members.

Although social media can be of good use, and keep people tuning in, it can also be irritating, in particular, when it comes to having immediate family on your page. People are abandoning the idea of calling up family members and friends on the telephone and using social media as a way to stay in touch. There are, indeed, some perks to having family on your pages. For example, if you’ve recently had a major accomplishment, social media is a great way to make an announcement to everyone simultaneously without feeling the guilt of telling one person over the other first. It is convenient in that sense but, it seems there are more drawbacks than benefits. Here is a list of reasons why you should consider removing your family from your social media platforms:

  1. They use social media to as a reason not to show love in person, on the phone, or to show artificial love.
  2. It encourages disconnection. When was the last time you’ve heard that person’s voice or listened to them breathing?
  3. You can’t be your full self. You may have really conservative grandmothers or gossipy cousins who like to jump to conclusions based on your posts. You find yourself barely on your page because you don’t want to say the wrong thing to piss off some of them, or to be the center of conversation at a family gathering…Well, at least i you’re not a confrontational person anyway.
  4. You don’t want to see your siblings talking negative about another member in public, or promoting the fact they are doing illegal activities to get by.
  5. If you have a business, and the family is not your first cheerleaders or supporters, you will be disappointed about their lack of support, and begin to question their care for you.
  6.  Some of them are TOO active on your page. They comment on every pic and status update when they should find something else to do with their time.
  7. They use your page to pry and be nosy.

Family is a controversial issue on social media whether they are biological or in-laws. You may find yourself calling a family member only for them not to answer but to see them writing on their Facebook wall. For those family members who give you some form of substance on their pages, who motivate you, and make you feel like they are nourishing you in some type of way, sure, keep them. For the family members who are artists and entrepreneurs of some form, sure, keep them on your page to support their latest endeavors. For others ask yourself why you continue to store them in your contacts on your pages but not in each other’s phone?Have you ever wondered whether they would call if they were not on your social media pages? It seems as if people are using as a way of saying they get a chance to see you on a daily basis, which is not true. Yes, they are able to see some of your accomplishments and moods but unless you’re the type to post every time you think, feel, or do something (Oh, they exist out there!), they don’t know who you really are, and vice versa. They just know the person on the page because that’s who they connect with every time they log in. Let’s try unplugging from social media to have meaningful experiences with each other in real life. Not being on social media forces us to make real time for the people we care about instead of making excuses. We are so connected that we’re disconnected. Instead of writing on each other’s statuses from the next room, try having an actual conversation. You’ll be amazed at how much you can learn one another in actuality.


Do you agree, or disagree?

Let us know in the comment section below.



“Who Invented Social Media?” Retrieved from https://www.quora.com/Who-invented-social-media

Pic credit goes to colourbox.com



Build Your Own Pyramids

Build Your Own Pyramids

By Tequila Cheatham


The more conscious and self-aware you become, it is likely your circle will change. Everyone is not meant to stay in your life forever. As Bishop T.D. Jakes once stated: “Everything dead that has attached itself to you will be shaken loose, this is a purification process. You’re about to be released into a new dimension! You can’t bring contaminated things into a new place.” At some point in life, people will begin to shed which is not necessarily a bad thing. It is simply apart of life, which is one of the hardest pills for me to swallow, apparently.

I used to be in my feelings about people not reciprocating love the way I do; and, I could not understand why I was the only one reaching out for the sake of keeping connection. As I meditated one night, it became clear to me that it was time to build a foundation out of people who have similar desire to create stronger bonds as well. Kendrick Lamar said it best: “Build your own pyramids; write your own hieroglyphs.” I’m always looking to create durable relationships no matter the gender, race, religion, sexuality, etc. As long people are genuinely good-hearted, and are working on building themselves and others through spiritual means, financially, family wise and creating a foundation that will stand as strong as the pyramids in Egypt, I am eager to work with and befriend you.


Peace & Love

Y & <3


Sex & Sexuality: Normal, or Nah?

Sex & Sexuality: Normal, or Nah?

By: Tequila Cheatham

Sex and sexuality is often always the elephant in the room. People get fidgety, start squirming around in the chair, and even try to change the subject. How can something that has been around since the beginning of time be such a controversial topic?  Is sex a topic that should only be discussed behind closed doors with a partner? Why?

How does one approach a mate about being unfulfilled in the bedroom? How does one ask a mate to indulge in pleasures the other may not be okay with? Avoiding the topic of sex will lead to a series of issues within the relationship: unhappiness, infidelity, infections, diseases, pregnancy a lack of connection with your partner; and ultimately, a lack of connection with yourself.

It is no longer the Victorian Period when women were sexually oppressed. It is time for women to embrace sexual desires, and it is time for men to accept that we are all sexual beings. It is time to allow ourselves to feel, and incorporate those desires into our daily lives because it promotes self-happiness.

It all boils down to: being self-aware, accepting, and loving your person. When one is self-aware, it is a step closer to articulating wants. In this day and age, it is time to be honest with ourselves, be more open-minded, and enjoy our partners to the fullest especially if we plan on being with them in the long run. Once we learn to remove historic constructs that have shaped sex and sexuality, it is then we will liberate and see ourselves through a different lens; or, maybe no lens at all.

Sex, and sexuality is a matter of what makes one feel normal…normal in a sense of our own boundaries and limits, and what elevates our connection with ourselves. If we simply learned to embrace the idea that not everything as plain as it seems, we will begin to see that sex and sexuality is simply a matter of desire; and, since we all have different desires, our idea of normal should not be compared to another, rather shared. Your normal is your normal no matter who, what, when, where, how, or why.  We should start questioning this idea of what is “normal”, especially when it pertains to sex. How can something so personal be a factor that hinders us from connecting with each other? Unless it deals with misappropriation of children, or taking advantage of anyone without their consent, one does not have to explain who they are.

Circle of sexuality History of Sexuality


Y & <3